HERE’S WHY BREAKING UP COULD BE THE GREAT THING TO HAPPEN TO YOU

I’m more confident, focused, driven, strong, healthy, and happy than I’ve ever been before, and I want to help you get to that place too. So here are a few things I’ve learned along the way that can help guide your path, as you seek to rediscover and redefine who you are.

Make Time For Introspection

After a breakup, it’s hard to be alone. You’re left solo with your thoughts during a dark time in your life and you feel the urge to be around people to avoid sinking into depression. I do feel it’s very healthy to surround yourself with loved ones, but you also need to keep some time for you in your schedule – to process your feelings and gain perspective on where this next phase in your life will take you.

Some solo time around the house or out in nature will help, but even better is to book a solo trip to a place that’s completely new to you. For me, it was Thailand. I had always wanted to go. My ex never did. Naturally, this was the first place topping my single life globe-trotting bucket list. I trekked through the Thai towns riding solo, which was a deeply enriching experience.

Write That Down!

One of the most helpful things for me was to start a journal. Every few months, I’ll go back and read through it and amaze myself with how far I’ve come. It’s a constant reminder of progress and keeps you on track to achieve immense growth.

Be Grateful... And Awesome

Now’s a time not only when you can redefine who you are, but also how you perceive the world. I was in a toxic relationship that clouded my perspective with a very negative lens, so one of my main goals post-breakup was to rewire the way my mind works.

So, every day, as a part of my morning routine, I write down one thing that I am grateful for and one reason why I am the f-ing man! The practice of gratitude keeps you grounded and in the moment. Think you had a tough day at work? Balderdash! You have a roof over your head, a healthy body and a family that cares for you. Express gratitude often for the amazing things in your life and you will have a permanent positive glow that will change how you perceive life.

Take the time to remind yourself how awesome you are too! Odds are, if you’re reading this site, you’re dedicated to enriching your life. You probably do some pretty amazing things. Take time to absorb, internalise and embrace those accomplishments. I crushed that business pitch yesterday. My friends truly depend on me. I am making great strides in my fitness goals. Take the time to genuinely appreciate YOU and your confidence will skyrocket.

Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Without challenge there is no change. As you build the new you, you have to thrust yourself far from your comfort zone. Apply some pressure to what is convenient and comfortable for you. I recently joined an improv class. The thought of this was terrifying. I’m an introvert; I don’t like having the spotlight on me. But, it’s exceptionally awesome. I can’t wait for Thursday nights to get up on stage, and my growth and learning have been immense. Try something that scares you. You won’t regret it.

As you reach this critical juncture in life, it’s important to know that the decisions you make and perspective you take can have a profound impact on your future self. You can view it as if the sky is falling down, retreat to any bar in sight, and get sloshed off Fireball shots night in, night out, chasing tail to make the pain go away. Or… you can view this as an amazing opportunity: a new platform to rediscover and redefine who the hell you are.

There’s no formula for doing this. No two people will have the same experience. But, if you follow some of the advice I have laid out here today, I guarantee it will help guide you down your own unique path to being a supremely amazing dude. Now, get out there and reclaim your inner-awesomeness!

Breakups suck. Let’s not beat around the bush. There’s pain, anguish, anxiety, and fear. A major part of your life has been removed and your system has been shocked.